Warrior of Faith

As the year is coming to an end, I reflect on all the good and the bad that has happen in the 365 days. To be honest, this year has been by far the roughest and toughest year I have encountered. But even with the unfortunate happenings, I have learned so much about myself. I have learned my faith is what I rely on during the moments that I feel are impossible to overcome. I have learned that no one is invincible, not even myself. I have learned that as I get older, so do others around me. I have learned the value of each given moment. 


I have been blessed for so many years to never have to experience a close death in my life. But like I said, as I get older, so do others and health begins to grow weak. This past year I have had more deaths than I can count on my fingers.

You don't realize the ugliness of cancer until you have experienced a friend fighting through it. It's beyond confusing. One day the doctors says they are doing great, the next day they inform you on how much longer your friend has to live. The word cancer scares me… It is hard to be the rock to your dear loved ones during such an evil sickness, because cancer is unpredictable and a powerful infection. All you can do is pray.


No one is invincible. Everyone expects older people to pass away first... I was even one of those people who had this idea of death. I found myself assuming that I was guaranteed a life until I was at least 85 years old...but that is not the case. This year I was given a tough reality check that even little kids or people my own age are not guaranteed their lives. It’s never fun to receive a text message that your friend’s six-year-old boy died in a tragic accident, or your cousin’s girlfriend had a miscarriage half way through her pregnancy. Nor is ideal to find out your friend passed away through Facebook… Things began to get tough in the matter of a few months with bad news after bad news.

In the midst of this huge storm I was facing I had close ones attempt suicide, others go to the hospital, and discover sicknesses.

I felt lost…frustrated…confused…angry… and hurt.

My world was spinning so fast to grasp what was going on. I wanted to wave my white flag so high for God to stop this awful storm. Why was God making me become so familiar with death? Why would He make all this happen at once? I was becoming numb with my emotions…after one unfortunate tragedy to the next I wasn’t feeling anything. About the time I got over one event, another storm was brewing.  I began to expect the worst of each week. I began to become paranoid that someone was going to inform me on bad news. I refused to express my pain to others, I didn’t want to give light of my messy life, and I sure didn’t want people think I was weak.


Sometimes I think I am stronger than I actually am. I find myself thinking that I can solve all these problems by myself. Sometimes I think that if I just avoid the problem there won't be one. I find myself believing that if I bottle it up my emotions and do not express hurt it will show my strength. I felt like I had to be the rock for so many people when the world was caving in on me. 




In all reality, this is a joke... I am weak, and I need God to strengthen me.

God has shaken up my world in ways I never saw coming.


I know this may sound odd, but I can honestly say that I am grateful for God shaking up my world…I have never clinged to him more, and I have definitely seen my faith grow stronger. No, I am not happy to lose my family members, friends; watch loved ones go through sickness, and to have problems that may not be solvable.  But I have seen my faith get tested this year. I have realized some things are completely out of my control. I have realized the only way to show my strength is to lean to God. 

I must become a warrior with faith as my armor to get through the toughest of battles.

One of my biggest of weapons was prayer.

Through the midst of my storm I prayed and I prayed.

I prayed for strength.

I prayed for peace.

I prayed for it all to make sense to me.

Only God knows why he needs the people he takes away from the earth.

I know we find ourselves saying, “Everything happens for a reason.” I honestly think events do happen for a reason…maybe not intentionally, but a lesson can be learned from everything we encounter. Unfortunately, I learned a very hard lesson.

I have learned never to pass up a moment to say, “I love you”, the value of a great hug, and how important is to cherish every second we are given on this earth. I have learned there is only so much you can handle on your own. It is okay to ask for help, and admit you are weak. {A very hard lesson for a girl who is the queen of stubbornness}. It’s crazy how when awful things occur and it stops our world, and it makes us put things into perspective.

We are not guaranteed life. I find myself expecting to have another week to live to be able to just push back things on my to do list, and not cherish moments with others as much as I should.

Every second given to us by God is a blessing.

Without the armor of my faith I don’t think I would be able to get out of the fog I once felt I was stuck in.

I know things get darn right crappy in life…but please remember that God knows what he is doing.

As for now, do not take another day for granted. Life is unpredictable, so cherish each day like it was your last.

I challenge you to make the best of each day this upcoming year. Do something you love, laugh until you pee your pants, and be kind to everyone.

You never know what storm someone is facing.  

{Xoxo- Natalie} 

That Awkward Girl Playing Cupid

Days like this I have to sit back and giggle at where I am at in life.... 

So during the holiday season you can just tell there is something different in the air that we are inhaling.  Hmmm..maybe a little thing called cuddle bug fever {Just kidding I'm just making up a disease for something doesn't exist...nor do I have}. For some odd reason, tis the season to be in relationships. I mean, I don't blame you love bugs out there...it would be lovely to cuddle up next to someone during these chilly days, look at twinkling Christmas lights, and drink hot chocolate next to a handsome hunk. But as you know, I titled this as an Awkward Girl's story...therefore things are about to get silly. 

For some strange reason, people in relationships come up to me for advice{Which I am honored}. But they are silly little hooligans for thinking I have proper relationship advice to give them, coming from a girl who hasn't been in one. I'm not sure if people forget this, or just assume I am in a relationship...but boy do I have you fooled. I must say, my relationship advice must be working because the couples are still together. Sometimes I'm not sure if I am giving advice or just babbling. But hey, I'm helping love stay strong.

Not only do I give advice, but I help people find their significant others gifts. Again, I do not know why people decide to ask the single girl for guidance. {No, I do not know the appropriate gift to give your man that you have been dating for year....maybe a night light?}. Hmmm...just blows my mind. 

As I sit here pondering about how silly this all  is... I realize I am helping others relationships grow and develop but here I am sitting next to my pillow. Hmmm...maybe I should give up playing Cupid, so Cupid can get hit by the love arrow and start their own journey.... 

xoxo 
Awkward Girl 

Crafty Christmas

Elf at Work

Check out the new crafts listed in "Get Your Craft On". Here are a couple of craft projects that are happening in the Short household. 

Spreading Christmas Cheer

Tis the Season to Give

I love everything about Christmas!! (Besides the angry people in the stores). I love the smell of fresh baked goods, the pretty twinkling lights, and the joy it brings to many.

This time of year is spent being thankful for what we do have, and to help others who are less fortunate.    Last month I made it my goal to find something I am thankful for each day. This month's challenge is to give back to others. 

I love being able to donate things that I already have in my house, or to go shopping for a Christmas Angel. It is such a good feeling to provide for others, and to see how it affects them. 

On another note, I am a huge advocate for animals. (I know you guys probably had no idea). I think it is important to remember that there are animals in shelters that do not have the little things such as blankets, treats, or medical needs during this holiday season, especially those animals that were a part of natural disasters. Roxy and I always try to donate toys, blankets/towels, money, or other doggie supplies to help those pups in need. 

We encourage you to find some type of way to give back during this holiday season. Whether it is donating pocket change to the bell ringers, buying a stranger a drink, or opening a door for someone. In the bible it states that we should serve others. Colossians 3:23-24 states, "Whatever may be the task, work at it heartily as for the Lord and not men, knowing that is from the Lord." There are so many ways to serve others the possibilities are endless!!! 

Get out there and serve others with a joyful heart.<3

XOXO Roxy and Natalie

Clothing Drive 

To end the semester with students packing up to go home for the holidays, Camelback staff decided to do a clothing drive. We figured students would start noticing clothes they weren't wearing, and would be able to donate their unwanted goods. This was beyond the simplest event to put on! All we had to do was place a box with a sign on it, and bam residents were donating like crazy! I literally put my box out for a day and my box was full! By the end of the week I had bags of clothes overflowing my box! My residents are great! All items were donated to homeless ministries. 

The picture below is some of my crazy staff members and I trying on the clothes that were donated. We had the whole dorm to ourselves so we figured we would have some fun while on duty :) 

Keep donating those unwanted clothes to people in need!!! 

Gobble Up the Thanks

Happy Turkey Day!!!

This month I have been focusing on thankfulness. Sometimes in this crazy world we forget to take the time and find one thing we are grateful for each day .God provides us with so many blessings, big and small. Look around my friends, you have sooooooo much to be thankful for! 

This past weekend I was able to celebrate baby Aubrey's first Thanksgiving feast. She is so precious, and I am so grateful for her cuteness. 

I hope you all have a blessed Thanksgiving! Wear those stretchy pants :) 
{Gobble Until You Wobble}

Standing Alone

Before I share a little part of my story, I just wanted to mention that sharing this part of my life has been very difficult for me. I knew I wanted to share this part of my story to show my heart to others when I began a blog...but it has taken me a while to build the courage to write about it. Whether it is writing about something I wouldn't normally say to others, or just to be overly vulnerable with the public, (which is beyond scary for any girl) I felt like this was a great challenge for me to accept. I decided it is time to open up my life, and most importantly share my heart to others. I do not expect to have a pity party for what I am about share with you...I only want you to know where I am coming from...and where I stand in this little crazy thing called life. 

I am twenty-two years old, and I have remained standing alone for all those years. No, I'm not trying to break the world record for the longest person to remain single...even though I just might... This definitely isn't one of the proudest moments I want displayed on my refrigerator at home, or to announce to my friends on my Facebook wall. In fact, I am beyond embarrassed about it. Never in million years did I think that I would continue to remain single for such long time. Honestly I thought I'd be in a long term relationship about to settle down by the age of twenty-two. Isn't that the stereotype for anyone in their twenties? You go to college, you find your soul mate, and BOOM you're married and have your life is figured out by the age of twenty-two. Of course I haven't been following that path to well. 

Of course some of my friends know this embarrassing fact about myself. Quite frankly I hate mentioning it to others because everyone throws in the phrase, "Your time will come", "It's a good thing to be single"...Man, if I had a penny for every time someone told me that I'd be rich. It's not that I don't believe them; it's the fact that I have a hard time accepting it because of the truth of me still standing alone. 

As much as people say it is better to stay single, everyone is fighting to be in a relationship. Lets face it; everyone wants someone to love them... I'm not any different. This topic has been on my heart for quite a while now. Sometimes the topic of singleness leaves me in tears...and those who know me know that I'm not the type to cry easily. I think it bugs me so much, because it's something I have no control over. Or maybe it's the fact that I honestly don't comprehend why I am standing alone.  Who really knows the true reason, overall it leaves me feeling frustrated and doubting who I am. 

How are you okay with standing alone?

Being single is something I'm not "okay" with. I do not wake up in the morning saying, "Wow I love being the third wheel", or "Man, I love having no one to go on cute dates with". It has probably been the biggest challenge that I cannot seem to overcome. 

I pray to God about it all the time. (The poor guy is probably sick of hearing my cries about this topic).  To be completely honest, sometimes I even find myself frustrated with God. It does not make sense to me of why God would feel I needed to wait this long to experience love. Or why God would put me in the situation to feel so low about myself because I haven't felt wanted by a man. I have been patiently waiting my entire life for the one thing people long for…love.  

How does it make you feel?

I know a relationship doesn't define who you are, nor should it. But being single for this long has made my mind and my heart think there is something wrong with me. Something so wrong that a guy will not express interest in me, or find me attractive. It's very hard to feel okay, and accept where I stand in this big world. It makes me feel that I'm not where I am supposed to be in life. To be twenty-two and have your friends around you get engaged, married, and beginning families of their own, is beyond difficult to accept that it is not where my life is at. Don't get me wrong, of course I am happy for my friends in relationships, one day I hope to experience the love they share for their significant other, but this long wait has does some damage to my heart and my mind.

Being alone makes me anxious for the future... It worries me that I may be single my entire life... I came to the conclusion that sure I can still be content with being single...life goes on with or without a man by my side. However, I would honestly hate not being able to love someone and share my life with. 

However, to others I portray that I have my life figured out, and I do not express a sense of loneliness. For the most part I am really talented at seeming tough as a rock, not expressing any "negative" emotions. I refuse to express my hurt, sadness, and doubt to others when it involves love. Occasionally I will be sarcastic with my friends about relationships and how I think they are silly, but deep down I truly desire for someone to love me, or even find me captivating.

I did not choose the single life...the single life chose me...(This girl has jokes)

Sometimes I even feel like I am completely approaching men in the wrong way…or not at all. As I mentioned in my Hidden Heart post, I am terrified of men when it involves relationships. I know I don’t put myself out there because I am scared of the failure and rejection that can happen. But I also give up because I do not feel worthy enough for a man to love me. I feel there will always be a girl out there that is better than me, which the man will end up loving more. I look at other women and compare myself to them...Never being skinny enough, funny enough, or attractive enough...It’s beyond hard for me to be confident that a guy might potentially like me when I know I'm not the best thing out there.

“Am I lovely? And to be rejected is to hear a resounding, No. A woman doesn’t want to offer her beauty unless she is guaranteed that it will be received. But life offers no such guarantees. We, too, must take risks.” –John & Stasi Eldredge

Overall I feel lost, unworthy, and forgotten about... I know this sounds quite dramatic but I am dealing with a confused heart.

Where do I stand?

I remain standing alone. It's hard to accept the only person I see standing next to me is my own shadow. There are tough days where I am completely miserable playing this solo life. Days where I feel a sense of bitterness to others who have their love life figured out. But then I have to remember my faith in God. 

Like most single women, I spend so much time and energy worrying about finding the one. It's beyond silly to think of how much time I spend daily on this thought. Especially because I go to a Christian College, where every girl out there is working on getting their “Mrs.” Title. Honestly, I am more focused on getting my education degree, but having this be the main focus for most girls on my campus is hard to avoid the thought about it. 

We as people, try so hard finding fulfillment of this love in other people, which most the time, it never works out. Why do we waste the treasure of love on someone who is not willing to love you. We should focus on developing a relationship with God. We should give God our love, for He will always love us, even on the darkest of days. 

Don't get me wrong; I still want to be in love with someone. Even though I know God loves me, I still struggle with a sense of loneliness. I want someone in my life that I can share my passion for Jesus with, a joke or two, and a friendship where we build one another up...but that is not happening right now in my life. Therefore, I must work on my relationship with God. 

I know that I would rather wait for the perfect man then just settle. Realistically I’ve waited twenty-two years, what’s another ten years? (But really God, please don’t make me wait that long). I know God has crazy, unimaginable plans for the rest of my life. It’s hard though… I want my life to look like most, falling in love with my best friend, living life together, and worshiping the man above. Even through this really difficult time of trying to remain patient, I have to remind myself that God isn’t finished with my story, and eventually my love chapter will arrive… and if it doesn’t, I’m sure God has bigger and better ways to use me in this world.

I know I am never truly standing alone… I know that I will forever have God next to me. As for now, I stand here looking for guidance from God.

He will quiet you with his love – Zeph. 3:17

“A woman of true beauty is a woman who in the depths of her soul is at rest, trusting God because she has come to know him to be worth of her trust.”

For all those single ladies out there... 

Know that you are valuable, and loved by a powerful man. I know the wait is sometimes is unbearable, but God isn't done with your story. Use this time to work on yourself, and building a strong relationship with God. This time is given to you for a reason, so use it wisely. 

xoxo 

Natalie